“Robo mom! Mommy you are going to be like a robot,” expressed my six year old with excitement.
Those were not exactly the comforting words I was seeking, but coming from my daughter they made me smile and laugh, knowing she understood what was going to happen to mommy. Behind my smile was fear, stress, anxiety, worry, and sadness all wrapped into one bundle of emotions.
What on Earth just happened to me? To my family?
Going from treating sciatic pain, to a herniated disk, then finally to congenital hip dysplasia was not what I had imagined being part of my life. Being at this stage, the diagnosis of hip dysplasia was not good news. To put it simply, I was bone on bone! There was no way of having any type of normal movement with my joint.
How could I be “mom” in this state?
I remember just pacing back and forth in the doctor’s office with no idea of how this was possible. Surgery was the only solution and it scared me to pieces. The only thing I could think of was my girls. How was I going to be there for them? How was I going to take care of them? They depend on mommy. It was just a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions. Having a hip replacement isn’t as simple as it sounds. It means completely removing a portion of bone and replacing it with a metal stem. Imagine the turmoil that was racing through my mind, my heart, and my soul.
Fast forward to March 8.
The day I knew it was all real that I had to learn how to dress, bathe, and walk again. It was not easy letting go of my mommy duties but it was for the best. If I wanted to become independent again, I had to become dependent.
Me. Dependent.
It wasn’t easy. My now two-year-old would spend most of the time at grandma’s. It practically broke my heart every night not having her with me. My seven-year-old was still in school but once summer came around she was home with me. She was a trooper with helping out as best as she could when I needed it. She amazed me with her noble self to be the one helping mommy. Yes, she still was her silly little self but deep down she understood that mommy needed help. It was a drastic change for her and she pulled through with amazing poise. I, at times, felt as if I was losing it but I had to regain my mommy value and keep moving forward. As the months came and went I endured learning to walk, dress, and bathe on my own. It wasn’t an easy journey but I prevailed. It has been six months since the surgery and I have sustained five months of physical therapy to strengthen and build endurance in my muscles.
At six months, I can say I’m almost back to normal. I can walk without assistance and do almost everything I did before surgery. The best part of recovery was being able to be Mommy again. That was my goal through recovery. My girls. Natalie and Annie were and still are my inspiration to continue recovery.
Robo Mom is now how I mom!