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Marrying Older – Just Like Wine


“What are you two going to have in common?” my mom asked, when I had mentioned that my then-boyfriend, at 14, was older than I. How much older? Just by a four-year punch but significant enough to highlight my taste in older men.

I think I’ve always liked older guys. I kept trying to connect with guys my own age, but it was a failure every time. I just couldn’t relate to them and eventually the infatuation faded. I felt like when I did date a guy 1-2 years older, I seemed to be the one who held the relationship together, making every day meaningful, wanting to talk about the news and books I’ve read. Obviously that was not interesting to a guy who is waiting for the weekend to club, drink, and smoke. That got old with me pretty quickly. Actually, it got old when I met my husband.


Since dating older men wasn’t just a fad but my personal choice, it didn’t come to my parents’ surprise when we decided to get married – me a mere 23, him 35. Yep, 12 years.  I found my silver fox and we had so much in common, but there are many reasons why older men make such great companions.

His salt and pepper hair: So hot! Not every middle-age man has it, but those who do own it!

He doesn’t stay out late: This is totally fine with me. I don’t think I would want to sleep alone every weekend because he’s out or going out clubbing, etc. He honestly would rather hang out with our little family, watch Shark Week, and eat a bowl of Captain Crunch.

image He knows cool stuff you’ve never heard of: Yes! Generation gaps can be a good thing culture-wise and musically. We totally have a good time dancing to New Edition, Spice Girls or Poison.

No need to be jealous of his previous relationships: Odds are they look and are old… older than me!

He sees past the beauty and surface: With age we all sag and wrinkle and also after babies – haha! He’s bathed me head to toe the day after my c-sections when I couldn’t even raise an arm, and brushed my hair after a tiring very pregnant bath, huffing and puffing. He has even rubbed my feet once or twice, just because.

He’s wiser: Whether it’s sports, nutrition, fitness, fake people, cars, … he just knows because he’s lived more, therefore he’s my guidance.

My point is that age is just a number. Whether marrying younger or older, there’s always one person who’s older in many cases and it works out well. So mom, we have plenty of things in common and some of those include our 3 nuggets whom we created because obviously we got along!


6 years later definitely more salt than pepper!!


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2 Responses to Marrying Older – Just Like Wine

  1. David July 6, 2016 at 10:59 am #

    there’s usually a sad end to this as women have a longer life expectancy and thus many years alone after Dad is gone.. but you can’t change who you are and love so just remember to live life to the fullest

  2. Jayne December 29, 2016 at 2:58 pm #

    I couldn’t agree more. My husband is 15 years older than me and we have two beautiful children and an amazing life together. Great article!

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