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How old is too old? [Co-showering]


At what age does it become inappropriate to be co-showering or bathing with your child? One, three, five…..never?

In my case I find it rather easy because I have three girls and I bathe with them at least four times a week to ease the process of showering and getting ready to go to bed. In other words, convenience. Even if some of us are still a little uncertain when to stop or those that know for sure when to, there are four common reasons that will alert us on the perfect timing.

“Co-showering feels uncomfortable”

In some cases this is more relevant when bathing with a child the opposite sex or maybe feeling less at ease when children become more aware of physical differences around age 2 or 3. This is more or less when bathing feels like an anatomy class rather than getting clean. With my girls, they stop bathing with daddy around 10-12 months because of the “stare”.

“Child wants privacy”

My 5-year-old already closes the door when she goes potty (sign of privacy) and has requested to shower alone already. This to me was a sign that she no longer wants “girl-shower time”. This might indicate independence, which if and when they are ready, with or without assistance, then so be it. (More on Detatchment: My Son is So Over Me)

“Stop by a certain age, no matter what”

At some point whether it’s same sex or opposite, it will get uncomfortable, even among siblings. This goes back to the previous point of “independence” and letting them understand good hygiene and proper ways to bathe. With my girls I’m extremely careful that they also understand that they should not shower or bathe with anyone but themselves… just because normally people shower alone.

“Mommy’s time”

Ever since I became a mom (5 years ago) going to the restroom or bathing alone seems irrelevant, and even though I love bathing with my girlies, play with bubbles, pretend make up with soap but at times I do ask Hubby to bathe the girls so that I can put myself together or close my sleep deprived eyes. If all I get is 15 minutes alone anyway, why would I want a toddler or preschooler crying? …because soap got in the wrong place, or the waters too cold, too hot…. This is not a reason about wrong or right but just plain ME time… completely alone… me me me ME! (More on mommy time – A Simple Reminder to Fill Your Cup)

So if you share bathing times, if you don’t, there isn’t a right or wrong but at some point these reasons will ring your door bell. In my case I’m blessed to have three girls whom are still little and that have a mommy which takes advantage of every second of the day. Right now I’m not willing to let that go, but slowly they will leave my coop….shower.

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