There comes a time during the day that all I want to do is just sit and ponder on what I don’t feel like doing. Is this normal? Or does this seem odd? At times I feel its okay but then during that same moment I feel odd knowing I feel this way.
Not wanting to do anything around the house has to be normal after the long work week but just sit and stare away at nothing seems to be out of reality. Stress, anxiety, depression, anger, loneliness all seem to become part of this “out of reality stare”. (Read more about PPD and depression here.) The stare becomes part of me and I’m aware of the stare but it doesn’t seem to bother me until I hear that familiar voice calling “Mommy?” or the familiar cry of the baby. I snap out of it and continue as if it never happened.
Is the stare supposed to be part of the normal cycle of the “Mommy World” which consists of working full time, children, and a home? What is the normal cycle of the “Mommy World?” I guess I can answer myself.
The description of the “Mommy World” depends on the Mommies living in this world. My “Mommy World” is different from the Mommy next door, the Mommy across the street, and the Mommy across the city. My Mommy World consists of “out of reality stare” which I believe is a moment of detachment that last for minutes to gain the ability to continue into the world of the “Mommy”. My “Mommy World” will continue strong as long as I can continue to detach for a few minutes with the “stare”. The words coming from my daughter “Mommy where are you?” will drift me back into my “Mommy World”. (Related: A Simple Reminder to Fill Your Cup)
How do you drift out of your “Mommy World”? And what chimes you back?