Nine Pointers for Leaving Dad in Charge

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When mommy needs to go out of town for work it’s usually something she is secretly looking forward to. Yes, I’m going to say it: A bed to herself, a peace and quiet pee, a long hot shower, a morning where she only has to dress herself….oh the list goes on, but wait that twinge of guilt then settles in. The hubby will be left behind with all of the responsibilities.

But wait, then I stop to think….does he feel this sense of guilt when he leaves on a business trip or golf game or fishing overnight? Poof….disappear my twinge of guilt. As a working mom there are so many daily expectations to keep up with: getting the kids to school on time, getting to work on time, making sure they have a healthy breakfast and lunch, making sure I eat something, looking kept together for work, remembering to check the gas tank, saying good morning to everyone who crosses your path, responding to overnight emails, making meeting after meeting and looking happy during them all…..and it hasn’t even hit the noon hour yet!!!! So when the opportunity arises to represent your company at a week or half a week-long conference, where you’ll more than likely sit through more power points than you did your entire freshman year of college, you secretly excitedly agree. You’ll actually attempt to enjoy it because just for a brief second, you have guaranteed peace and quiet at the end of the day. Before you leave the house though, there are a few things you’ll have to remember to make sure operations at the home front run smoothly.  After all, daddy is now in charge. Below are hopes to help you make your preparations for leaving the kids with dad a little more reassuring.

1.  School and/or Childcare:

If there is one person that must know you will be gone for a couple of days, it’s your sitter/nanny/day care director/teacher. Let them know, that in your absence, they should expect daily calls from you for a full report on your child’s progress and challenges. Let them know who you have left to oversee your children while you are away and if there is anything that they should need to let them know first, but to also inform you.

Don't Forget PM Doses

2.  Medication:

Any medication the children are currently taking should be photographed and fully detailed for your hubby. T-Chart, Venn-diagram, list, whatever it takes to help him remember which med is taken when and what diet your child should be following. Don’t forget to detail the amount of medication for each as well. I usually use a t-chart to show what meds need to be taken in the am vs. the pm.

3.  Dress Code:

Planning the week ahead. Iron and lay out all outfits ahead of time. Dad will think, even putting it in the dryer to unwrinkle is too much unnecessary time. Make sure to check the weather and plan according to scheduled activities. This includes: jackets, socks, shoes, bows, belts and any other items dad could possible mismatch.

4.  Kid’s Menu:

Planning for meals is usually a practice we follow on a weekly basis, but without mom in the picture the kids will be having chips, fruit “juice” and pizza every single day. Essentials to stock up on: water, milk, fruit, kid-appealing veggies, gold fish, pretzels, macaroni/pasta, ground beef and chicken breast.

5. Extra Help:

Let any extra help you get around the house know you’ll be out of town and only your hubby will be there. You’ll leave any extra duties notated for them on the kitchen counter. Make sure you get with the help before you leave as they may need extra supplies to fulfill the job and of course dad will find out the morning of.

6.  School Projects:

Please please, do all you can to get any projects out of the way ahead of time. If the kids decide to tell you on Saturday night, get it done before you take off. Dad will settle for the extra points taken off, he knows he’ll be able to go in to teacher and justify it by saying “my wife was out of town!” Like if that’s an acceptable or reputable excuse for the kids or HIM!!!

Add Alarms to His Phone

7.  Extracurricular Activities:

In addition to planning outfits and menus, make sure to schedule any after school activities on, you guessed it, an actual tangible calendar. Laminate/page protector it/make copies….whatever it takes to make certain dad knows at all times where he and kids have to be after school and work.  Additionally, add reminders and alarms to his phone!   If others are helping with drop-off and pick-up, make sure to include that in the schedule. Don’t forget to pack their snacks, uniforms, instruments or any other supporting materials they may need for their extracurricular activities. Dad will end up dressing the kids for practice at the beginning of the day, thinking he’s being efficient with dirty laundry and time.

8.  Grandparent’s or Other Family Time:

If you have the privilege of living close to grandparents or family, attempt to schedule a time when the kids can visit grandparents during the time you’re away. It’s a win/win situation, grandparents/family get to spend time with the kids and dad gets some time to himself. As if he really needs it 😉

9.  Don’t Forget to Facetime!:

Remind dad to have device charged for calls from you after five.

 

I must note, that in no way am I trying to knock my hubby’s sense of practicality, but he is after all a guy. And we all know that most of them could survive off of pizza, donuts, tennis shoes and wrinkled clothes if they had to. Their argument, we survived without you didn’t we????

I know, you may think that being a blogger is some glamorous “SITC” Carrie Bradshaw opportunity, but in reality, I’m in my hotel room skipping out on the “professional” cocktail hour so that I can catch up on all the extra “me” things I wish I had time to do back home. Ignoring the skivvies I’m in and the unpacking I’ll get to in a bit…….I’m ALWAYS in mom mode and I’ve already scheduled my next text and call to the husband to make sure the kids are bathed and fed.

I can only hope that my recommended pointers will help you during your next business trip or even a little mommy getaway.  Just remember, the amount of time the kids spend playing video games or the amount of mud they track in is completely out of your control, and its ok!   Now I’m off to have a dinner with a fellow mom, where I can order and actually take my time to eat and have an adult conversation which will more than likely lead to breast feeding and kid-friendly activities ….you know how it goes mom!

Until next time!

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Felicia
Never is there a dull moment in her life, either working as the Business Development Officer for Texas Regional Bank or volunteering for several community organizations within Edinburg and McAllen, all while mommying. Known as momma to son Felex (2 years old) and Emoree (6 months old) and mommy to step-daughter Erin (8 years old) and best friend to husband, Alexis for the past 5 years. Between toddler trials & triumphs, soccer games & pre-school selections, Alexis and Felicia are learning to find some time to start their traveling adventures a little at a time by finally taking their honeymoon this summer. Felicia loves dancing to decade music, a good salmon and a good red wine; thank God Alexis is good at two, out of the three!

3 COMMENTS

  1. I honestly feel bad for mom’s who can’t even get away for the weekend without micro managing their household. If you married a person, and had children with this person LETS JUST HOPE that means you have enough trust and faith in them to get through the daily motions of parenting without you. After all this isn’t a stranger, it’s your spouse, who lives with you ALL the time. With the exception of the medication advice (anyone taking or administering regular medications should have a list). When mom is a away the kids will play. Maybe the kids will eat pizza and drink juice, and go to school with wrinkled trousers its not the end of the world. Remember that your family needs the time apart as much as you do and if doesnt go too well, they will be all the happier to see you on your return.

  2. I love this post! You’ve keyed in on some very important details that I’ll remember as the kids get older and I get braver to leave them alone with daddy. I have always gone into great detail about things like feedings and sleep routines for bedtime when leaving a grandparent in charge for a few hours. It helps to keep consistency with the way I do things and spelling out all the “might happen” scenarios to help them get through it. This doesn’t happen often, but I can relate. Also love the phone reminder ideas, too!!!

  3. This is awesome for me on my first trip away from my kids in two years! I was a nervous wreck and just didn’t know where to begin! Reminders on his phone to match the ones on mine? Brilliant! SO many little things when you do them every single day but I know my husband will appreciate the effort and I’ll appreciate not getting a call from the school while I’m in a meeting out of town reminding me that open toe sandals are not allowed at school! Thanks for sharing!

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