A Working Mom Wants to Know…

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A Working Mom Wants to KnowI have an almost-18 month old toddler. When it was time to go back to work after maternity leave I considered two child care options: a day-care center or in-home care from a babysitter. Many of my friends and colleagues send their babies to day care, so I thought I’d look into it. But something was tugging at my heart. I had just spent the last 3 months at home with my baby, he had all of his things here, all of his routines were here. As my husband drove us to the scope out the first day care, I burst into tears. “I can’t.” I said. “I don’t want to do this.”

“OK” he said. “Nanny it is.”

So here we are. I have the MOST amazing babysitter a mom could ask for. She is like an angel sent from heaven. I mean it. She’s smart, caring, way overqualified, and just a wonderful person. Most importantly she loves my baby. I knew 5 minutes after walking away from our interview that she was the one. I offered her the job 10 minutes later. My son loves her. I love her. Get the picture? She’s THE. BEST.

Remember the part where I told you that she is way overqualified for her job? That’s the truth, not an exaggeration. And as much as she loves my baby and as much as we’ve got a good thing going on, the day is approaching when she needs pursue the career that she worked so hard for in undergrad and while obtaining her Master’s degree. I support her without hesitation and know that she can’t stay with us forever (even though I did tell her not-so-jokingly that I’ll keep having babies as long as she wants a job with us).

So now that my son will be 18 months old in 3 weeks, I think he might be ready for day care. He is super active, very curious about other children and he really tries to engage them when he sees them at the park or the library. He is curious about everything. Seems like he is ready right? I’m trying to convince myself that he is ready…but am I?

I don’t even know how to go about finding the right day care for him. What is the adult to baby ratio? What do they do all day? Will he get to take his afternoon nap? Will he have a routine? Will the teachers love my baby as much as his sitter does? What if the other babies don’t like him? What if he gets sad or hurt? What questions do I ask? How do I handle dropping him off every morning without totally breaking down?

I should just quit my job. That’s it. I am quitting my job.

I’m kidding. I can’t quit my job, and frankly, I like my job. So, back to the insane series of questions.

But really, I can’t be the only mama out there who doesn’t know how to approach the child care situation. I know that the questions I am asking myself are slightly crazy, but also sort of common, right?

So mamas of the Valley, what are your tips? What should I be looking for? What should I ask of the day care centers I visit? Beyond trusting my gut, what should I be on the lookout for?

I’m standing by for your words of wisdom.

Love,
An Anxious Working Mom

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rachelcarreon
Rachel Carreon grew up in the north suburbs of Chicago and has since lived in Portland, Oregon, Strasbourg, France, and Phoenix, Arizona, but is most proud to call the Rio Grande Valley her home. She works full-time for a national education non-profit as a leadership development consultant, and was formerly a teacher in a k-3 self-contained special education setting. She lives with her husband Robert , their 4 year old son and 2 year old daughter. They also have a blue heeler mix named Huck. Rachel loves cooking for friends and family, running outdoors and all kinds of exercise, and playing outside with her family. Rachel is excited to build community with readers, to share a bit of herself, and to learn from others and their experiences.

4 COMMENTS

  1. We struggled with this issue too, and at 18 months our son started at a Montessori preschool in Edinburg. He had a nanny that loved him and was great but we felt like he needed the social skills so we enrolled him and it was one of the best decisions we’ve made. One thing we loved about the school was when we walked in they asked “are you looking for a daycare or a school?” When you find the right place you feel the same love from the staff and you have no doubt it’s the right place for them.

  2. Thanks for the encouragement @Jennifer! My husband and I went to visit a few places last Friday, and I could definitely tell the difference between a school-like setting and a straight day-care setting. As a former teacher, I love the school setting, but am also so aware that our son isn’t used o so much structure. It helped that at his check-up today, his doctor said: “oh, he’s ready for day care.” There was one place that just “spoke” to me. I felt totally comfortable. I’m still nervous of course…

  3. If there is a tv in every class or to many televisions I would assume they use the tv to much in the classroom. Ask you fb friends for recommendations. I have heard good things about covenant christian school in McAllen. I know the director there. Vanguard is good. I know teachers and parents there.

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